"I, no no no no. No, what I said..."

Again, I promise to share some vacation stories, but there continues to be a hold up. My camera, along with my souvenirs and a healthy batch of my clothing, is still somewhere between Heathrow and my house. Supposedly. Until then, more random thoughts...

When Karen and I got engaged in Boston, back in the heady days of 2002, it just happened to be the weekend that the Patriots finally won the Super Bowl.

Being in an Irish pub in Boston, watching the Pats win, was truly an awesome experience. We emerged from the pub to find the entire city in rapture, a sprinting mass of people hugging each other and howling with glee.

The next day, we stopped by the Patriots' victory parade. Tens of thousands of people turned out to welcome home their champions, and the mood was again one of unbounded joy. As the parade dispersed, the crowd spontaneously began chanting in unison, as if they were all of one mind, one voice.

And what did they chant?

"Yankees Suck! Yankees Suck!"

This was my first real introduction to the depth of rivalry between the Red Sox and the Yankees. It runs so deep, a Patriots celebration is as good a reason as any to boo a baseball team in New York.

Because of this, I was able to appreciate the inherent humor in Gov. Bill Richardson's spectacular implosion on "Meet the Press." Slate's coverage notes that the painfully awkward interview ended with Tim Russert's softball question about the Red Sox, which presidential candidate Richardson still botched dramatically.

So with that lengthy prelude, I present you with the transcript of Richardson's closing:

MR. RUSSERT: You spent a lot of time in, in Massachusetts. Are you a Red Sox fan?

GOV. RICHARDSON: I’m a Red Sox fan, but I got into trouble in New Hampshire. You know why? Because I said...

MR. RUSSERT: Luis Tiant, the fund-raiser. But, now, governor, this is very serious. In your book on page 18 it says...

GOV. RICHARDSON: No, about Mickey Mantle?

MR. RUSSERT: You said you’re a Yankee fan!

GOV. RICHARDSON: No, no, no. I said—no, no, no.

MR. RUSSERT: I mean, you can, you can...

GOV. RICHARDSON: No, no, no, no.

MR. RUSSERT: ...you can have different views on immigration, assault weapons...

GOV. RICHARDSON: I, no no no no. No, what I said...

MR. RUSSERT: But when it comes to Red Sox, Yankees.

GOV. RICHARDSON: What I said, the Associated Press asked me, “If you weren’t running for president, if you weren’t running for president, what would you rather be?” I’ve always been a Red Sox fan, but I said if I weren’t running for president I would like to be number seven, Mickey Mantle, playing center field for the New York Yankees.

MR. RUSSERT: “Because of Mickey Mantle, I became a Yankee fan.”

GOV. RICHARDSON: I, my favorite team has always been the Red Sox.

MR. RUSSERT: You’re a Red Sox fan.

GOV. RICHARDSON: I’m a Red Sox fan.

MR. RUSSERT: End of subject.

GOV. RICHARDSON: End of subject.

MR. RUSSERT: You better get rid of this book.

GOV. RICHARDSON: Oh, no! I’m also a Yankee fan. I also like...

MR. RUSSERT: Oh, now, wait a minute!

GOV. RICHARDSON: You can—Tim...

MR. RUSSERT: I guarantee...

GOV. RICHARDSON: No, I know, I got in trouble...

MR. RUSSERT: ...if you go—if you go to Yankee Stadium or Fenway, you cannot be both.

GOV. RICHARDSON: But I like—Mickey Mantle was my hero. If I weren’t running for president, and the Associated Press asked me, I’d play center field for the New York—I wanted to be number seven. And—but I still love the Red Sox as a team. I mean, this is the thing about me, Tim. I can bring people together. I can unify people.

MR. RUSSERT: Yankee fans and Red Sox fans?

GOV. RICHARDSON: Yes.

MR. RUSSERT: Not a chance.

I feel like 38% of a man.

OK, I'm back and will be posting a few thoughts and insights on my trip to Europe pretty soon.

But first, I have to share two disappointing facts I learned about myself today:

38%

(Apparently, compassion for loved ones and strangers in peril does nothing good for your score.)

and

I am 90% Addicted to Coffee

Just 90%? Sigh. Be right back...gotta go refill...

I'm afk.

Talk to you again around May 23.

OK, I lied. THIS is humbling.

Well this is humbling.

Hey, who knows...after Germany and Prague this month, I might be up to 3%.

If you want, click on the button to make your own, and post the link in the comments. (Posting the code for the map doesn't work.)

My talk with the Swampers.

It's that time of the month again....time to show you the new video clips from The Year of Alabama Arts.

This time, I have to say, it's probably the coolest set yet. These are from my interview with two members of the Muscle Shoals Rhythm Section. They're the ones Lynyrd Skynyrd referred to in "Sweet Home Alabama" when they said, "Muscle Shoals has got the Swampers."

The Swampers are studio musicians who recorded and played on everything from Aretha Franklin's "Respect" to Skynyrd's "Free Bird." Despite all their success, they are still wonderful, humble guys. Enjoy!

Baby robots! Baby effin robots!

I'm feeling more and more like a local these days. I think a major part of that is going to the same events as last year.

This weekend's Magic City Art Connection was even better than a year ago. Weather was perfect, the collection of artists was diverse, and, of course, we got a framed print of the Best. Painting. Ever.



It's called "Where do baby robots come from?" and it's by former Birmingham resident John Lytle Wilson. Check out his stuff. All great. But of course, we own his best work.

For the record, this isn't me...

But don't get me wrong, I'm proud of the guy.

What's your best practical advice?

First off, I've officially started writing for AdFreak, in case any of you were waiting for a signal flare to start reading it or add it to your RSS reader. I'll probably be posting 3-5 times a week.

But there's not much meat on that bone, so we'll move on to a livelier topic:

What is the most practical advice you've ever been given? Stuff that's just all-around good to remember?

Let's see, I've got...

• On driving: "Always accelerate when changing lanes." - My sister.
• On driving (and life): "When you're steering between obstacles, don't look at the obstacles or you'll hit them. Look between them." -My mom.
• On drinking: "Never mix dairy and booze." - Myself, after an unfortunate "White Russian Night."
• On life choices: "Don't ever get divorced twice and then decide to go to grad school on student loans." -My mentor.

What have you guys got?

Ur

I can't quite explain why I so love the Internet phenom phrase, "I'm in ur base, killing ur d00ds."

Variations on the theme are just about the only text messages I enjoy sending, such as when my brother-in-law was meeting me for lunch, and I texted him, "I'm in ur base, eating ur bread."

Well, Mental Floss has delved into the issue pretty thoroughly. (Mostly as a good excuse to show funny pictures of cats.) So if you've never laughed along with me at things like this...



...then you should probably read the Floss post.

'I was just glad Alabama didn't have polar bears and smoke monsters. Whew!'

I feel like I have several ideas for deep, thought-provoking and tremendously entertaining blog posts. But sadly, I lack the time to piece them into anything of consequence.

So instead, you get an exclusive look at the TV commercial I spent the past few months working on for The Year of Alabama Arts. It even features Michael Emerson, who plays Ben/Henry on "Lost." Huzzah!



Yes, I realize there's no obvious "writing" for this spot, but I did do the interviews. Except the one with Emerson. We had to hire some folks out in Hawaii to do that. Oh well.

A mere 317 posts later, blogging pays off.

So it looks like I'll be going national ... dare I say international? ... with this blogging thing.

No, not with this blog specifically. Cafe Asteria will remain an intentionally unfocused writer's journal for friends, family and some chick in Calgary.

Here's the deal: I've been asked to be a writer for what I can honestly say is my favorite advertising blog, AdFreak. It's a part-time gig, of course, so it's not like I'm leaving agency life behind.

I think this will be a great opportunity. For one, it's flattering that they approached me with the idea. For two, my boss is cool with it...as long as I hold off starting until we launch our current behemoth of a campaign. For three, I think it builds street cred for my agency to have someone involved with a blog this respected.

So thanks to all of you for keeping me blogging, thanks to Tim at AdFreak for giving me a shot, and thanks to the bookstore for being so understanding when I quit last night.

I'll keep you guys posted on when I actually start up with AdFreak, so that I can start mining you all for good ideas. As I said, it'll be a few weeks. Until then, you should still read it. That way you'll know that, yes, even MTV spots featuring hookers are fair game. I know, I know...when doesn't MTV feature hookers, right?

I will soon begin stumping for an age cap of 28.

Got some unexpected props today, when the president of my agency announced I had won the annual "Rookie Award." I think he had some very nice things to say about my work, but I was a little too surprised to hear what it was.

It was great recognition, but I also thought it was funny to be a 29-year-old Rookie of the Year. It left me wondering who held the record for Oldest Rookie of the Year.

The good news is, it's not me.

In baseball, which seems the most rookie-obsessed sport, the title generally goes to Sam Jethroe. His story is pretty interesting.

He was one of the first three Negro League players who tried out for the Major Leagues, but none of the three, including Jackie Robinson, was hired from the tryout. Soon Jethroe was picked up by the Boston Braves, and his first year earned him the National League Rookie of the Year honor.

That was 1950, Jethroe was 32, and he has held the "oldest" title ever since. The oldest rookie in the sport was another Negro League veteran, Satchel Paige, who pitched his first Major Leagues game at 42.

But the real hero I discovered today was Connie Madigan. After a lengthy stint in minor-league hockey, Madigan played his first game in the pros at age 38.

So what makes Madigan so great? His record of being the oldest NHL rookie can never be beat. That's right. Never.

Why? Check out this tidbit:

Barring a rule change, the record will technically stand forever. Due to the large influx of Russian players in the late '80s, the NHL limited its definition of rookie to players 26 and under. (Source)

So there you go. Were I a professional hockey player, I would be out of luck. But at 145 pounds, I'd probably also be dead.

Blogging Griner quotient doubles. Science textbooks pulled for emergency revisions.

Big congratulations to my wife, Karen, who has joined the exciting world of blogging. She even started off strong, with a post that's simultaneously thought-provoking, sad and uplifting.

Personally, my favorite part of her blog is that her "about me" section ends with, "That's all you need to know for now." It helps give everyone an insight into the unique challenges I faced in courting her.

Enjoy! Oh and yes, I'm still besieged by work, so the blog updates remain soundly on the back burner. Maybe Karen will pick up the slack.

Vader's comic genius.

Sorry for the very few posts lately, but work is eating me like Cookie Monster with a bag of ... um .... broccoli?

Anyway, here's a clip that gave me a much-needed laugh-until-I'm-openly-weeping moment today:



Via Mental Floss.

Debunk'd!

Has anyone else heard that the Cookie Monster was changed to the Veggie Monster on Sesame Street?

I was told that by someone very matter-of-factly a few weeks back, and I promptly started asking people whether that was true. I pictured a green version of CM, which would really just look like Oscar, sans trash can.

No one could tell me if it was true, probably because I am not yet at the point in life where my friends find themselves watching Sesame Street.

Strangely, Snopes.com rides to the rescue. Turns out, it is all just a myth/misunderstanding/paranoia. There was even an online petition, signed by thousands, aimed at boycotting Sesame Street until the Cookie Monster returned. Crazy.

Cookie Monster even denounced the media for the misunderstanding. Check out this exchange with Matt Lauer, quoted by the Snopes article:

Cookie Monster: Me like fruit.


Matt Lauer: And there you have it. Cookie Monster likes fruit, and not cookies.


Monster: No! You members of the media blow story way out of proportion! Me still like cookies!


Lauer: Then why fruit?


Monster: Why not fruit? It delicious! And healthy. Me still eat cookies, like me world-famous for doing, but now me eat other things, too.

Yeah, I realize it was probably staged, but that doesn't stop me from laughing about Cookie Monster saying "members of the media blow story way out of proportion."

So, um... there you go.

Carry on octopus sir

I'm a big fan of my friend Adam Stoves' art. But it wasn't until I was looking at his stuff online the other day that I noticed how great his rarely seen titles are.

So here are a few of my favorites. I didn't include the pictures, so that you could focus on the names. But just click on any one to see the art.

a man whose face was so priceless that it was preserved through obliteration

carry on sir. carry on octopus. carry on octopus sir.

a creature birthed from a collection of discarded boxes

man, deaf and bored by the nature of things, has again embellished this place.

the wedded couple, after much deliberation, makes a grandiose exit

how to tell who of them are the imposters

For more of Adam's work, check out his Flickr photo page or his MySpace page. Oh, and there is my crappy video of Adam's recent one-man show. Enjoy.

Bless his heart, he's a beautiful flower.

Poor Jonas. He couldn't resist biting off his bandage, so today the vet exiled him to coneville.

This is apparently the new kind of "soft" cone. He supposed to wear it at all times, but I don't think he deserves to be walked around the neighborhood in that.

More folk artists, comin' atcha.

We've posted some new videos from my interviews with Alabama artists.

These feature Woodie Long, who is a fascinating guy. He grew up picking strawberries and cotton for his sharecropper dad. Although you'd think he had it rough, he actually has tremendously fond memories of this time, and that's mostly what he paints.

Anyway, enjoy:



To see more of the interview clips, check out our YouTube channel.

Sad times at the agency.

Sadly, the founder of my company died yesterday. I know most of you haven't heard of Robert "Ace" Luckie, but he was still a frequent sight in our office and always remained interested in what we were up to. (His sons now run the company and are both great guys.)

I wish I could say a bit more about him, but I obviously didn't get much time to get to know him. However, I was honored that our president (one of Ace's sons) asked me to write the memorial announcement. I know it wasn't easy for him to work with me on something like that while his dad was so sick, but I think the end result was good, and my boss said he's gotten a lot of feedback on it.

For now, you can see the memorial on our agency site. It's going to act as our front page for a little while.