What's that? You just bought a new house with steep hills and lots of stairs? How are you going to celebrate?
Oh, apparently I'm going to twist my knee until I can barely walk. How else can I appropriately supervise Karen while she brings in the furniture?
But as I wait to hear back on when a doctor can look at my knee (which I torqued playing tennis, but has been hurting for quite a while), I at least have something to keep me in high spirits.
I recently stumbled across a three-year-old nugget of Internet gold called "Steve, Don't Eat It!" It's one man's attempt to eat some of the worst things available at the grocery store. He starts with "Potted Meat Food Product" and works his way down...far down... from there.
I must say I especially enjoy the section on making (and then drinking) "prison wine." It includes such invaluable insight as:
This one's aroma was slightly more earthy. Do you know that smell of grass right after it's cut? That's nice. I was just making chit-chat, because this smelled like rotten eggs tucked into the anus of a dead cat.
I really don't understand what could have gone wrong! I used moldy bread and socks, EXACTLY LIKE THE RECIPE SAID!
It's vulgar, and I wouldn't recommend reading it while you eat, but it gets high marks for passing time at work.
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